#2 Leaving

There are only a couple of days left before I head to India. 11 to be exact.

People ask me 'Are you prepared?'

And I'm wondering: can you ever be prepared for that?

Sure. I've ticked off (most of) all the boxes on my to do list. I arranged visa, banking issues, transportation and my first 3 weeks of stay.

I will stay the first couple of days in Delhi, then Agra Jaipur. My plan is to head further north to Rishikesh after that and than further to Nepal - but who knows?

If you know me you know that I like to plan and prepare.

I have a plan C for my Plan B. I figured out possible bad-case scenarios and thought ahead of what to do then. I picked up indian Rupies and even some American Dollar just in case.

But can you ever be prepared enough mentally? Spiritually?

What about preparing the soul?

Having all the travel-related things in order and set up an extensive packing list (more on that in a later post) I am now focussing on preparing my soul, my heart. What feelings do I take with me to India? What feelings do I want to leave being? What longing hides in my soul?

And then, the only thing left to do is trust.

Trust that it will be alright.

Trust that, whatever happen, I will find a solution.

Trust that I will find kind souls on my journey who will help me.

Trust that things will work out.

While all around me I experience pure abundance. The days getting brighter, the full moon shining her beautiful light up on me, first signs of re-awakening life, people close and from far supporting me in every way possible, receiving a job offer via phone… (“I feel honored, but I have this tiny thing planned…. Can I reach out to you when I'm back again?”)

And I know: I am held. I am safe.

I have been asked 'why do you want to go to India?'

And I can't even really answer this question. Sure, I want to see the vibrant colours, experience the holi-festival and explore the depth of yoga philosophy and spirituality.

But for the rest I can't really tell the 'Why'. I just know that this is something that I have to do. A calling of my soul I ignored for way too long.

So in that way - yes. I am prepared. I am prepared for a long time already.

So as I round of the last days at work, arrange the final things and have last goodbye coffees with friends, everything inside me expands. I'm not nervous. (Well, maybe a tiny tiny bit). I am not excited (well, sorta). All I have in me is a big, calm, vibrant FINALLY.